Is it really? Really? I know that there is a bunch of science that goes into determining when the winter solstice happens and winter begins but can’t we use some common sense in declaring winter? I have been freezing my ass off for a month now and according to science that was all still fall.

It snowed! A few times. Nope still fall.

I think our seasons need to become less official and less universal.

How winter should be declared:

  • If a state’s temperature goes below freezing for few a day, its winter there.
  • If the people just have a vague anger because they don’t remember what warmth is, that place is in the middle of winter
  • Winter cannot, under any circumstance be declared in a place that is 80 degrees

Yeah, its fucking 80 degrees down in Miami today. Guess what season it is down there according to science… Winter! I have a fucking problem with that. You don’t get to rep winter down there if you aren’t wearing a big puffy coat and mittens (Like when Eminem called out ICP for repping Detroit when they live 20 miles away in the song Marshal Mathers) (I enjoy the fact that in that analogy ICP is Florida, cause they are both weird as fuck and I have an unexplainable hatred towards them both). That’s not winter. 80 degrees is a nice summer day and I don’t care what science says about the stars and the earth’s position.

ew

(Its actually a very explainable hatred but that’s not the point of this blog)

Meanwhile, I’ve worn sweatshirts to bed for the past month. In Mass, winter’s not just coming, its been fucking here. If there is enough snow on the ground that I have to go out and shovel, its no longer autumn. The trees aren’t dropping leaves anymore because nature knows that it’s actually winter and it took care of its leaf issue months ago. Autumn doesn’t get to have such a magical reputation of apple picking and kids playing in the leaves if I also have to keep a snowbrush handy.

As a country we don’t need to all be in the same season, because as it stands now our seasons make zero sense. Winter is cold. If it’s cold where you live, its winter. If it’s not cold and you are considering knocking off work early and heading to the beach, congratulation it’s still summer. Fuck you science, try and make some sense next time with all your equations.

(Can you tell I am cold as fuck and possibly have a mild case of seasonal depression?)